Idiots
by sammers99
Summary: The moment Monkey D. Luffy saw Roronoa Zoro, he knew he wanted him... As his first mate, of course! However, feelings are funny things and sometimes first mates become best friends and best friends become a little bit more... special. This story is a gradual process of ZoLu.
1. Chapter 1- Luffy (Ep 2)

_Author's Notes:_

 _1\. This is my FIRST EVER fan fic! I love to write, though, so hopefully it'll be somewhat decent. Feedback is always appreciated! :)_

 _2\. This story switches perspectives. I will try to remember to put whose perspective it is for each Chapter 1, Chapter 2 etc label_

 _3\. I have only watched Season 1 of One Piece, so my characters will only consist of the original five member crew. (Season 1 ends after the crew escapes Logue Town and this mysterious wind dude helps Luffy get away. No one spoil anything for me :P ) I could have tried to added the others, but A) don't want to spoil anything for me by looking anything up! and B) I want to remain accurate with my story and I want the readers to feel like they are actually watching an episode of One Piece._

 _4\. I will be using a LOT of events shown in the anime. I have not read the manga yet. I am trying to be as accurate as possible with my writing (so for example, using actual bits of dialogue from the anime in my writing) BUT because it is a fan fic and I want to have some ZoLu fun with it (plus, you know, plagiarism) most dialogue will not be word-for-word but just very close instead!_

 _Enjoy! :)_

 **LUFFY**

I knew I wanted him the moment I saw him!

Don't ask me why, because I really don't know. I just found something very alluring about him. Maybe it was because that despite being tied up to a pole and publicly humiliated, he still had this aura of fierce determination. Maybe it was because when he looked up at me, I saw the same burning passion to not just live, but to follow a dream, that I had in my own eyes. And yeah, maybe it was because I was very intrigued by how he could remain so muscular when he was left there to starve to death. I could barely go three hours without food.

I can definitely say that my reasons for wanting him did not include skill. Apparently he was a famous swordsman, but had I ever heard of him? Of course not. Did that mean anything? No. But that's just to prove that I didn't know why I wanted him on my crew. I just did. He seemed trustworthy, noble, loyal, determined, strong. He had survived in this courtyard for thirty days with no food or water or other living essentials. He seemed like everything I could ask for and more. He would be the perfect addition to my crew. Maybe we would even be friends! How I loved making new friends!

So there I, Luffy, future King of the Pirates, stood, staring triumphantly at the man I would declare my first mate. I was confident with my choice. Besides, how could he possibly refuse a position on my crew?! It was gonna be an awesome adventure, after all!

As my new friend, Koby (who was rambling on about the dangers of this supposed bandit), and I watched him from the outside of the marine base wall, he suddenly looked up.

"You two are an eyesore. Get out of here," his rugged voice said.

I was about to say something more, when suddenly a ladder appeared next to Koby. The words escaped my mouth as I watched a young girl, no older than ten, suddenly appear at the top of the ladder. She hoisted herself over the wall and dropped to the ground, a small package in her chubby, little hands.

"Hi, Mister! I made you some rice balls! You must be hungry," she said sweetly, unwrapping the package and showing her present proudly to the man.

"What, you got a death wish, kid? Scram," he said, eyeing the rice balls.

"Oh, but mister, you've been out here with nothing to eat for so long! It's my first time making them, so I hope they're good!" she insisted, moving her hands closer to his face.

"I'm not hungry! Stop annoying me, kid!" he exclaimed, turning his head from the rice balls.

Meanwhile, next to me Koby was blabbering on about how we had to get her out of there because who knows if that bandit will react violently and hurt her and blah blah blah.

"Bu-" she began to protest, again.

"Get out of here before I kick your ass, little girl!" he threatened.

"That's so mean!" Koby whispered, appalled by his behavior. However, I could tell the man was simply trying to get her out of there to avoid further trouble. I could see in his shadowy eyes that he was hungry, his eyes trying to avoid looking at the food for too long. Seemed sacrificial to me.

I was about to inform Koby of this when suddenly a high-pitched, flamboyant voice echoed across the courtyard.

"Now, now! No one likes a bully!" the voice called, and suddenly, what I assumed to be the marine captain, came into view.

His blonde hair was styled a little too well, and his dark purple suit made his pale skin seem to glow in the bright sunlight. I groaned. He looked like an asshole.

"Roronoa Zoro! You seem to be handling this well," he continued haughtily, striding over to the girl and man with the utmost cockiness. I hated him already.

"Look! Another weird guy," I pointed out to Koby, in case he hadn't seen him yet.

"Great! He's probably with the marines. He'll save the little girl," Koby replied hopefully, fear on his face as the scene played out. I rolled my eyes. He meant well, but sheesh, he was a coward.

"Oh, look! Rice balls!" the haughty man declared, snatching one from the package before the little girl could react.

"Those aren't for you!" she angrily said, jumping to try and get it back.

The man took a huge bite, and savored it for a few seconds, before he suddenly spat it back out.

"YUCK! What is this?!" he demanded, continuing to throw a fit while he started to scrape rice off his tongue.

"I made them with sugar to try som-"

"SUGAR?! You idiot! You're supposed to use salt, not sugar! How stupid could you be?!" he cried in distress, whipping the package out of her hands and stomping on the other rice ball.

"Stop! I worked really hard on those!" the little girl whimpered, tears flooding her eyes. My heart hurt for her. This guy was a douche.

"That's just awful," Koby said quietly. He seemed shocked. It must have been a hard sight for him to see, what with his admiration for the marines and all.

The man finished his stomping and the little girl knelt to the crushed rice ball. "I worked… s-so hard to make t-those!" she stuttered through her tears.

The man, Zoro, looked at her sympathetically. Anger crossed his face when he moved his gaze back to the flamboyant man.

"Oh, that's too bad!" the marine captain said patronizingly. I felt my blood boil. What a dick!

"Putting your horrible cooking skills aside, I must ask, have you read the notice that was posted?"

The girl looked up from her rice ball and stared wide-eyed at him.

"No? You must not have!" and with that the man pulled out a piece of paper from the inside of his jacket, and held it up to his eyes. He cleared his throat and began to read casually, "'Those who assist criminals in any way will be executed. Signed Marine Captain Morgan.' Funny! Even little brats seem to fear my daddy!"

"Daddy?!" I asked, my mouth dropping. If this guy was this horrible and annoying, how much worse could his father be?

Koby perked up, his face thoughtful. "So… His… His father is Captain Morgan?" Just when I thought the kid couldn't get any more shattered, his face dropped once more. I thought he would be relieved to know this dick wasn't the captain, but as I mentioned, his father must be ten times worse if this was his son.

My attention was redirected to the action below as the haughty, shriek-y voice said, "Toss this kid out, right now!" I looked down to see the captain's son pointing at the marine behind him, not even bothering to turn around.

The marine raised his eyebrows, his jaw agape. After a few seconds, he finally regained his composure and began to argue. "But, sir! Yo-"

The captain's son turned around and gripped the soldier by his shirt. "I said, RIGHT. NOW. So get to it or I'll tell my father. Do you understand?"

The soldier gulped and hurriedly said, "Y-Yes sir! I'll do it!"

The soldier looked at the little girl and pain overtook his face. He clearly felt horrible about this decision.

With heavy steps, he walked over to the little girl and began to pick her up. He seemed to whisper something in her ear, and before I knew it, the little girl was flying over the wall.

I saw her go flailing past me and before I could think, quickly stretched my arms out, caught her, and shot myself over to her so I could cushion her as she landed. I moved my hand to the back of her head to keep it steady in case the fall was a little too rough. I hit the ground with a thud, but at least she was safe. Maybe being made of rubber wasn't so bad after all, eh?

We stayed there for a moment. I think she was happy to have a pair of protective arms around her after that trauma. I didn't mind. I always had a soft spot for little kids.

Finally, she began to move and stood up, holding out a hand to help me. I grabbed it and jumped up, smiling at her.

"Thanks, mister!" she said, gratitude seeming to radiate from her huge smile.

I felt my smile widen. She was cute.

Koby suddenly rushed over to us, acting as frantic and cautious as ever as he asked us if we were okay, if we had hurt anything. When he saw I was completely fine, he moved straight to the little girl, acting very big brother-like.

I figured my job was done so I headed back over to the wall.

Time to recruit my first-mate.


	2. Chapter 2- Zoro (Ep 2)

**ZORO**

Captain Morgan's son was laughing hysterically. "You are just so intent on staying alive!"

I spat at the ground. "Yeah, that's right. I'm going to make it forty days without a problem, got it?"

"Don't sound so suuurrreee!" he squealed out through his laughter. "You still have ten days left!"

The shithead then proceeded to leave the courtyard, leaving me with my thoughts.

Ten days left. That was all I had. I would get out of there and everything would be fine. After the first few days, the hunger didn't even bother me much anymore. There had been enough rain to keep me hydrated, which was my biggest concern. I was going to get out of there, and then I could go back to training and bounty hunting, helping me to ultimately become the greatest swordsman. I would not falter.

I heard footsteps shuffle in front of me and snapped my head upward. If it was that stupid Helmeppo come to taunt me, again…

I was relieved to find that it was not Helmeppo, who had stormed out after having the little girl thrown out. I was, however, incredibly annoyed to see the scrawny kid who had been spying by the wall. Who the hell was this guy, anyway? This idiot walked around like he owned the place. What really got me was the straw hat. Did he expect anyone to take him seriously with that on his head?

"So. I've heard you're a bad guy," he said bluntly. I felt myself trying to fight a smile. There was something enjoyable about his voice. Maybe it was the scratchiness, or maybe it was the warmth in it despite his brutal honesty.

Wait, bad guy?!

I raised an eyebrow, choosing my words wisely. I didn't want anyone in this court with me. They didn't deserve to suffer. Besides, people were so aggravating. Forcing myself to sound like a dick once more, I replied, "You're still here? Leave!"

He didn't even flinch and instead walked towards me. "You're strung up here for the world to see, humiliated, and it doesn't even look like you've tried to get away. Are you really even that strong?"

I felt my face flush. How dare he question the strength of the future greatest swordsman! "Mind your own damn business!" I spat.

He smiled. I felt myself longing to smile with him. The kid's smile stretched from ear-to-ear, and it was so genuine and playful. Honest, yes. Mean, never.

"I don't know how you've done it. I would starve in three days out here," he commented, smiling down at me. He was shorter than me, that I could already tell, but the way I was tied forced me to slouch against the pole. It irked me- the last thing this kid needed was an ego boost, even if it was only caused by height.

I looked back at him to see him smiling admirably at me. I felt myself smile slightly as I threw my own defenses at him. "I've got more spirit than you could ever have! I'll get through this… ordeal. This I swear," I declared triumphantly.

The kid gave a short laugh, and declared, just as triumphantly, "What a weirdo!"

Weirdo? Me? He was one to talk! I was about to tell him just how idiotic he was when I realized he was walking away. I quick looked down at the rice balls. I hated begging like this, but I had to survive. I had too much to live for. My purpose wasn't fulfilled.

"Wait!" I called, hearing my voice soften.

The kid turned, waiting expectantly.

"Could… uh… you pick that up for me?" I asked sheepishly, gazing at the crushed rice ball.

The kid gave me a horrified look, but bent down, anyway. He picked it up and played with it in his hands. "You're really gonna eat this? Because it's mostly mud."

"SHUT UP! Just give it to me! NOW!" I barked out, making sure he knew this wasn't the time for joking. This idiot probably never took anything seriously, not even a starving man who knew a muddy rice ball was better than death.

The kid's eyes widened. Although he didn't look hurt by my snippiness, I still felt a little bad. I didn't mean to be so harsh. I just didn't have the time to deal with annoying idiots, even if they were just cute teenagers. Now hear me out, when I say cute, I don't mean attractive or desirable. He was probably seventeen or eighteen, MAYBE nineteen at the most, and there was something just kind of adorable about his honesty and scratchy, pubescent voice, like in a brotherly way. BUT! In no way would I develop a soft spot for a dimwitted idiot like that. I just felt bad for yelling at him when it was clear he was too ignorant to realize the extent of my hunger.

The kid didn't seem to be bothered by me, though, because he gave a quick look of disgust at the rice ball, and then proceeded to feed it to me. He was careful to try to pick out as much mud as possible and delicately put it in my mouth, extra careful not to get his hands in my mouth by mistake. But by that point, I didn't care. I probably would have licked rice off of his hands if I had to.

I was taken aback by how muddy the rice balls actually were. It hadn't rained for at least a day, leaving the ground to be mostly dry. That being said, I thought he was just exaggerating about the muddiness. It couldn't be MUDDY. Dirty, maybe, but muddy? No. So I thought.

I began to cough as the mud and rice got stuck in my throat. Finally I was able to swallow it all. My stomach rumbled, letting me know it wasn't fulfilled, but I knew that small bit would be all I needed to push through the last ten days. I would make it out of here.

The kid smirked. "Should've listened to me!"

I quietly said, "It was good… Thanks for the, uh, food."

I honestly was thankful, though. Although I didn't want to admit it to this cocky bastard, it really was very kind of him to feed me that. I was already grateful to the little girl for bringing it to me, even though it killed me to see her get thrown out of there after my attempts at being an asshole to get her to leave. But for that kid to stay there and feed it to me even though he knew what could happen to him? That was true kindness.

The kid looked at me long and hard. Slowly a small, knowing, almost mischievous smile rose to his lips. What the hell was that about?!

Without another word, he left the courtyard, leaving me to myself once more.

Not going to lie, I kind of was sad to see him go. His company was refreshing.


	3. Chapter 3- Luffy (Ep 2)

I had walked back into the town to find Koby and the little girl, whistling all the way. I had found the best first mate ever! Even if he didn't know it yet…

I finally found them and gave a big grin. "Well, I have some great news!"

"Which?" Koby asked, clearly not believing me.

I gave him a look, and said, "He ate the rice ball! He loved it!"

The little girl, who had been fidgeting with her hands, looked up. Her whole face lit up, and she excitedly screamed, "REALLY?"

"Oh yeah! He loved it! Ate every last grain of rice!" I responded back, equally excited.

Her eyes shined. "That's great!"

Koby looked between the little girl and me. "I wonder…"

"Wonder what?" I asked, eyeing the alley we had sat in, looking around for food. I could go for some meat.

"I wonder if Zoro is really as evil as everyone thinks that he is," he said quietly, looking thoughtful. I smiled. There was no way that weirdo could be evil. Bitter, yes. Evil? Never. He was a big old softie somewhere. I could just tell.

The little girl snapped out of her happiness and quickly turned to Koby. "HE'S NOT! He's… he's good because… he got himself punished… for us," she said sadly, turning her head towards the ground.

I raised my eyebrows. He got himself in trouble for them? A sense of pride washed over me. I knew he was a softie! That being said, HOW did he get himself in trouble?

"Sorry but, you're making no sense," I said gently, tapping the girl on her shoulder to encourage her to continue her story.

She sucked in a breath, and quietly began her story. "Well, that dumb Helmeppo is the son of Captain Morgan… He was roaming through the town one day, being the big jerk he is, and yelling at the citizens of the town to step aside for his "beautiful" dog. This dog looked like a rabid wolf! He was just as angry and vicious as Helmeppo himself… He was going on his normal rants about how if people didn't do what he wanted, he would have them executed. Today he was threatening to execute people if they didn't get out of the way and his monstrous dog.

"He finally stopped terrorizing the streets and came into my family's restaurant, which I had been hanging around in that day… The monster dog came in and started eating food right off the people's plates! The customers were terrified of the beast… I couldn't let this dog ruin what my family had worked so hard for, so I took a shovel we had and started trying to scare the dog away with it, swinging it around! Helmeppo had to have a word, though, and asked if there was something wrong with the way his dog was behaving… My mom frantically yelled at me to put it down, seeing the rage come into his eyes…

"I hesitated, realizing that if I didn't listen to my mom, we'd get in trouble… Not just me, but the whole restaurant… In my moment of thought, the dog suddenly turned to me, snarled, and jumped at me," she said, breaking into tears. I put a hand on her shoulder as she tried to regain her composure. This certainly was traumatic for such a young child. She finally was able to control her sobs, and continued shakily, "Suddenly, one of the bar stools was thrown and hit the dog right in the face! I had uncovered my arms from my face and looked up to see the man… Zoro!... as he looked fiercely at Helmeppo… Of course Helmeppo got angry, realized he was the feared pirate hunter, and started bothering him… Helmeppo foolishly tried to attack him with his sword, which Zoro of course defended with a kick to the sword. Helmeppo stumbled backwards in surprise and Zoro used that moment to punch him, sending him flying to the ground, and then drew his sword and lightly touched his cheek with the blade…

"That was when Zoro sacrificed for me and my mom… Helmeppo threatened to have us executed by telling his father… Unless Zoro agreed to be strung up for a month. Helmeppo promised to free him if he survived that month…

"Without hesitating, Zoro bravely said, 'Then one month it is.' And he dropped his sword from his hand…"

She took a deep breath, and sadly said, "It's been three weeks. Helmeppo keeps punching and kicking him while he's tied up!" She turned to me with wide eyes. I could tell she felt guilty. "He's so unfair! I don't know… I don't know how to help him!"

And with that, the little girl once more broke into sobs. I looked at her long and hard. I felt pained for the little thing. She was clearly scared and filled with regret. I couldn't help but feel a warmth wash over me, though. This man was hard as rock and cold as winter, and yet underneath it, he had a heart big enough to sacrifice himself for a little girl. I felt a grin come to my face. He would make the perfect first mate.

Koby's voice snapped me out of my daydream. "I can see why you're upset."

Suddenly a crash sounded through the alley, and a very annoying, flamboyant voice said, "I'm hungry! Bring us what you got!"

I felt the anger boil within me. Not him, again! He already ruined the life of my first mate, at least for now, but no way would he start trouble, again! I got up without a word, storming into the restaurant. When I walked in, he was rambling once more about all the food he wanted and how this small town just wasn't good enough for his clearly refined tastes, when he suddenly blurted out, "Maybe to entertain myself I can just execute Zoro!"

My eyes widened. There was NO WAY he was going to kill MY first mate! He was MINE!

Without thinking, I ran from the entrance over towards the asshole, fists clenched. I punched him without a moment's hesitation, all my frustration towards his unfair, hypocritical ways flying through my arms and into his face.

He looked at me stupidly, confused and scared, and exclaimed, "YOU just hit ME!"

I felt my anger boil again. WHAT AN IDIOT! I threw my arm back, ready to give him another punch, when suddenly Koby's whiny voice came behind me and he held me back. "Don't do it, Luffy!"

"This guy is SCUM!" I said angrily, glaring at him.

"You actually HIT me! I AM CAPTAIN MORGAN'S SON!" he exclaimed, holding his face like the baby he was.

"Like I CARE!" I spat back, disgusted by his gross face.

"You'll care once he executes you!"

"Why don't you be a MAN and FIGHT?!" I yelled, praying he would fight. I wanted to beat the shit out of this asshole! He was scum! He was cowardly! He was full of bullshit! I HATED PEOPLE LIKE HIM!

"Luffy! Please stop! Why do you want to be on the Marine's bad side?!" Koby pleaded, still holding me back.

I looked at Helmeppo, who was still cowering and crying on the ground. Determined, I thought of the green-haired swordsman I saw hanging in the Marine yard. I thought of his bruised, tanned skin and the ragged movements of his sculpted chest as he breathed. He would be mine.

"I've made up my mind," I spoke quietly, dangerously. I knew what I wanted and I was determined. "Today, Zoro joins my crew."

I was getting him out of that town and he was coming with me. No one would stop me.


	4. Chapter 4- Zoro (Ep 2)

**ZORO**

The heat had become unbearable by midday.

Sweat dripped down my face like a waterfall. I tried to lick the sweat as it came near my mouth to preserve water, but my attempts were useless.

How easy it would be to just stop trying to eat… to drink… to do anything at all…

I shook my head and let out a grunt to remind myself I was still alive. Suddenly her face popped into my mind… the smiling, big-eyed girl I had loved so dearly in my youth…

I had made a promise. I refused to die in a place like this.

Roronoa Zoro was not one to break promises. He was not one to die either. He had to become the greatest swordsman first. With that thought filling my head, I lifted my head high with a smile.

SHIT. When had that scrawny straw hat guy gotten there?! What the hell?

"You, again?" I grunted, refusing to break eye contact with him. I couldn't help but notice how intense they were. He had such a warm face, and yet this dark, passionate eyes…

My thoughts were broken off as he said in his scratchy, developing voice, "I'll untie you, but only if you promise to join my crew."

I lifted an eyebrow. He wasn't wasting any time. Wait, did he just say crew? To a pirate hunter? "Your… what?"

"I run a pirate crew. I'm looking for people to join… I could really use a first mate," he said with a big smile, walking closer to me and tapping his finger on my nose. I felt myself softening ever so slightly. Why did he have to be such a cute kid?

I shook my head in disgust and gave a smirk. "No way. I would never stoop to joining up with a criminal," I spat out. "Screw that business."

He let out an exasperated sigh, and angrily put his hands on his hips. "What's wrong with being a pirate?!" he exclaimed defensively.

My eyes widened, shocked I had to explain this. "They're despicable! Like I'd ever want to join up with one! Sheesh!"

The stupid kid started laughing, and gave me a wink. "Oh, come onnnn. Everyone already knows you as some awful and vicious bounty hunter who's out for blood!" He giggled, again, and flicked my head gently with his fingers. The nerve of this brat…

"Well, they can say whatever they want about me, but I have NEVER done a single thing in my life that I regret." Suddenly, my resolve and passion had found its way back into my veins, and I confidently said, "I will make it through with this challenge."

The kid eyed me up and down, and then smiled warmly. I felt warmth enter my own body. I had forgotten what it was like for someone to look at me like I was a person, again. Of course, I would never let him know I appreciated him acknowledging my humanity, so obviously I kept my smirk on my face. Couldn't let this cocky bastard know I may actually enjoy his company.

"And after that… I'll accomplish what I want!" I added triumphantly, refusing to let him get the best of me.

His eyes widened, looking slightly concerned. "Uh… yeah… That's real great… But, we have a slight problem, Mr. Tough Guy. I've already decided that you're going to be on my crew!"

My head, which had fallen to my chest due to it being much more comfortable, suddenly snapped back up to look at him. He was smiling proudly, and I felt anger rush over me. Forget if he treated me like a human and not a criminal! He didn't own me!

"WHAT?! YOU CAN'T DO THAT!" Damn him!

He crossed his arms smugly, clearly enjoying getting a rise out of me. How had I fallen for his dumb little trick? "I hear you're the best swordsman around… It could just be a rumor, though…"

My anger increased, and I barked out, "Well, I AM… But that idiot captain and his son took mine away…"

I missed the cool metal of my blades… The instinct with which I led them… They always seemed to know just where I needed them to go. They felt like their own person, rather than an object I controlled.

The kid's smile became even more smug, which was something I didn't think to be possible. His voice dropped to a whisper, and he teasingly, almost flirtingly, said, "Well. I guess I'll just have to get them back then."

My mouth dropped, my voice catching in my throat as I uttered out, "What?"

His coy little smile suddenly turned into a big grin which took up his whole face, and he said excitedly, "Yeah! So if you want your sword, you're just gonna have to join my crew!"

I felt my face flush with anger once more. This son of a bitch! Damnit!

With all the force left in my body, I yelled, "NOW YOU'RE REALLY PISSING ME OFF!"

With a cheerful, childish laughter, he went running off. His glee seemed to be propelling him, and I couldn't help but marvel at him.

He was annoying. He was cocky. He was inconsiderate and demanding, very selfish. However, from the looks of it, he seemed as if he was really going into the base. I was shocked. He was actually going to get my swords back? He was willing to risk that just so I could join a pirate crew? What baffled me even more was that he was going alone into such a risky and dangerous place. The Marines had been corrupt, and I felt myself worrying slightly for his safety. He was a punk, but he was young and he had a lot of spirit. As much as I hate to admit it, it would have killed me to see those bastards crush his spirit.

I snapped myself out of my own thoughts and realized the idiot had taken off in the complete opposite direction of the base. What. A. Freaking. Idiot.

"Hey, genius! Base is in the other direction! Idiot!" I called haughtily. How did he have a pirate crew?

I put my head down in shame, annoyance, frustration, and many other emotions with which I wanted to forget with a nice midday nap. Suddenly, though, I heard the kid give a grunt, and yell, "GUM GUM…. ROCKET!"

I looked up and felt my eyes widen and mouth drop as suddenly he stretched his arms to grab the base and went flying towards it. What the actual hell was this kid's problem?!

What the hell was this guy?


	5. Chapter 5- Luffy (Ep 2)

**LUFFY**

HA!

I couldn't believe how clever I was. Or how desperately this guy wanted his stupid swords back. Don't get me wrong- he was in a terrible position and it would have driven the sanest of men to madness. No way was I laughing at that. Nope, I was laughing at the way he drooled a little when his swords were mentioned, the dopey look he got on his face as he thought about them. A hungry look had washed over him when he realized I was actually going into the base. What a weirdo; but, hey, he was MY weirdo now!

With this exciting news overwhelming my mind, it seemed like a short job until I made it from the execution yard to the front door of the base. However, I stopped in my tracks when I noticed the weirdest thing yet about this town- there were no guards by the door. Like, this was the FRONT DOOR we're talking about here, and they were too stupid to guard it? Even I wasn't that dumb!

However, my distraction did not last long. I had a mission- I needed to find that weirdo son of the captain and get Zoro's swords back! I needed my first mate! I looked around, still disbelieving the fact no one was guarding the door. I was about to march in, when suddenly a ruckus came from above.

I looked up to the roof. However, I was unable to see anything. All I could make out was a dull roar of voices. With a shrug, I stretched my arms out, grabbed the side of the roof, and with a triumphant yell, bellowed, "GUM GUM… ROCKET!"

It wasn't necessary for me to yell out "gum gum" every time I wanted to stretch; however, it did make it much more satisfactory! I let out a laugh as I flew above the ground; this never got old!

Suddenly, I noticed I was not on the roof like I had aimed for, but was instead flying high above all the soldiers and the captain on the roof.

"DAMNIT!" I called in frustration as I continued to soar into the sky. I was excited to see, however, a rope attached to a big stone thingy. I grabbed the rope, and managed to successfully jump off the giant sculpture and onto the roof of the base. The ground shook and trembled, causing me to turn around. The structure, which I assume the soldiers had been trying to lift, had completely fallen on the other side of the roof. Oops…

I scratched the back of my neck awkwardly. "Uh… Sorry… About… You know… That."

Suddenly the statue toppled over the side of the roof and fell to the ground with a crash, sending another tremor through the earth. Although slightly regretful of ruining the statue and the hard work the soldiers had put in, part of me was also gleeful because WHOA THAT WAS THE COOLEST CRASH EVER! AND I CAUSED IT!

The grin that had snuck onto my face was quickly erased when a loud, booming voice echoed through the sky. "HAVE HIM KILLED IMMEDIATELY."

I turned my attention to the voice. Sure, he was big, but was he really that to- HOLY SHIT WAS THAT AN AXE IMPLANTED IN HIS ARM?

A whiny voice distracted me from the axe-arm.

"Daddy! That's HIM! The one who pushed me!" Halmeppo cried out.

I immediately perked up and went over to him, despite his screaming and petrified looks over at me. "Hey, you! Nice to see you, again! So, you have something that I kind of need to get back from you! It's for a special friend!" And with that, I threw my arm around him and dragged him off the roof and through the door leading to the lower parts of the base.

I ran frantically down the halls, trying to confuse the onslaught of soldiers that would be chasing me any minute now. Sure, the rooftop rendezvous wasn't my most brilliant idea; however, I was smart enough to know I needed to run quickly and make myself as unknown as possible to the captain and soldiers!

After a few minutes of running and losing the soldiers, I asked, "Okay, so tell me where Zoro's sword is!"

Halmeppo, who had been screaming, kicking, and crying hectically, finally said real words to me, "I can tell you if you put me down! I promise!"

I wasn't about to give in to this creep that easily! However, when I looked down at his face, it did look kind of red and like he was having trouble breathing. I didn't like him, but he didn't need to die. I let him go, and looked expectantly at him, ready to grab him back if he tried to run off.

"They're in my room! We just passed it! At the end of the hallway, to the left!" he choked out, dropping to his hands and knees on the floor.

I gave him a look. "Well, why didn't you say so earlier? Now we have to go ALL the way back!"

Before I could turn around, a voice pretending to be brave yelled, "Don't move!"

I turned my head slightly to see some Marines pointing their guns at me. Really? Guns? Cornering me in a hallway? That was the best they could do?

I turned to face them, waiting expectantly.

"Let Halmeppo go!" another one demanded. This one seemed to have a bit more courage, but not by much. The Marines were supposed to protect the citizens, and yet they were afraid to chase me? What cowards!

"No way!" I replied, standing Halmeppo up in front of me as a shield. What were they going to do, shoot their precious brat of a captain's son? "You can try shooting me if you want."

Halmeppo immediately started screaming in his oh-so-annoying voice, and without a thought I ran through the guards, still using Halmeppo as my shield. Even from the back, I doubted they would shoot because the bullet could go through me and into the royal brat.

Now it was time to go find those swords.


End file.
